How Do You Respond to a Compliment? Workplace Japanese for Disagreeing, Making Suggestions, and Taking Feedback

This article introduces phrases you can use in four workplace situations: when you are complimented, when your opinion differs, when you want to make a suggestion, and when someone points out a mistake. Each phrase comes with notes on who you can say it to and how polite it is. The focus is on situations where your words are correct, but the other person understands something different from what you meant.

A Welcome Party Where Someone Took "Today Is Bureiko" at Face Value

This scene is fictional, based on a situation that is common among learners.

At a welcome party for their department, the manager, Mr. Ono, said, "Kyō wa bureikō da" ("Today is bureiko"). Daniel, a new employee, had doubts about the sales policy decided last week. Right after the toast, he said, "I think that policy is wrong."

His senior colleagues kept smiling but stopped eating. Mr. Ono said, "Well, well, let's eat," and changed the subject. Daniel was confused. He had spoken up because he had been told it was bureiko.

The Digital Daijisen dictionary explains "bureiko" as "a party held with no regard for differences in status or rank, or for etiquette," and gives the example "Kon'ya wa bureiko de yarō" ("Let's make tonight bureiko") [1]. What the dictionary describes is a party.

"Bureiko" is a signal that people should enjoy the party without worrying about seating order or hierarchy. It does not necessarily mean that you may say anything at all on the spot, including criticism of company policy. If you have an opinion about the policy, you can avoid causing friction at a party by saying something like this:

• "Regarding the policy, may I consult with you again at a later date?"

Save the main discussion for a meeting or a one-on-one conversation.

When You Are Complimented, Say Thank You and Add Some Information

There is research on how people respond to compliments in natural Japanese conversation. Daikuhara (1986) analyzed 115 compliment exchanges from the natural conversations of 50 native Japanese speakers. According to the summary by CARLA (University of Minnesota), 95% of the responses were ones that "avoid self-praise" [2][3]. The breakdown is as follows:

• Denial, such as "ie, ie" or "sonna koto nai" ("no, no" or "that's not true"): 35% [2]
• A smile or no response: 27% [2]
• A question back, such as "sō?" ("really?"): 13% [2]

This is an old study, and it looks at natural conversation, not the workplace. Even so, it shows that it is not surprising for someone to answer a compliment with "ie ie."

There is other research too. In a discourse analysis of everyday Japanese conversation, Ko Yanni's paper reports that responses using informative comments appeared often, especially in conversations between people meeting for the first time [4]. An informative comment is a response that gives information about what was praised while also showing the speaker's own evaluation. It is used alone or combined with agreement, thanks, or disagreement, and is said to help the conversation move forward while avoiding self-praise and rejection of the other person's goodwill [4].

This pattern is easy to use at work.

• "Thank you. It's thanks to the advice Ms. Fujii gave me."
• "Thank you. I think changing how I presented the numbers helped."

The first shares the credit with the people around you. The second answers by touching on what was actually appreciated.

Replying with just "arigatō gozaimasu" ("thank you") is not rude. But if the person who complimented you wants to keep talking, adding one more sentence makes it easier to continue.

Humility does not mean saying "I can't do it." If you actually did something well and you pretend you didn't, the conversation stops making sense. Acknowledge what you did, then mention the people around you, as in "I was able to do it thanks to everyone's help."

A person who answers a compliment with "ie ie, watashi nante mada mada desu" ("no no, I'm still nowhere near good enough") does not necessarily see themselves as truly inferior. It is sometimes used as a set reply to praise. If you respond with "Why do you put yourself down?", the conversation goes off track. In that case, a light reply such as "No, I really think so" and then moving on to the next topic is enough.

For Disagreement, Use an Opening Phrase and Avoid Stating Things Flatly

When you disagree in a meeting, put a phrase before your main point.

• "May I check one thing? How should I understand the point about ...?"

This puts your disagreement in the form of a question before you say you oppose. It leaves the other person room to explain or add to what they said.

If you state your opinion directly, avoid flat assertions.

The form on the left is not incorrect. But when you say the same thing to a boss or senior colleague in a meeting, the form on the right is more likely to be accepted.

You can also use opening phrases (cushion words).

• "Shitsurei desu ga" ("Excuse me, but..."): when asking for someone's name or circumstances
• "Oisogashii tokoro osore irimasu ga" ("I'm sorry to trouble you when you're busy, but..."): when interrupting what someone is doing
• "Moshi yoroshikereba" ("If you don't mind..."): when making a suggestion
• "Ainiku desu ga" ("Unfortunately..."): when saying you can't do something

Suppose a senior colleague asks, "Can you do this by the end of today?" and you don't have time. You can say:

• "I'm sorry. Unfortunately I'm tied up with another matter right now. Would tomorrow be all right?"

Instead of saying "I can't," this phrasing gives both the reason you can't and when you can.

When nobody speaks up in a meeting, that does not mean everyone agrees. Some people disagree but stay silent because they don't want to disrupt the room. If you are leading the meeting, try asking, "Is there anything else anyone is concerned about?" The phrasing above will also make it easier for those who have been silent to speak up.

For Suggestions, Ask Permission First

When you present a new idea to your boss, ask permission before you start explaining it.

• "While building on the current approach, may I make a suggestion?"

If you say "This method is outdated" and then present your idea, it sounds like criticism of the person who created the current method. If you ask permission first, the other person has time to get ready to listen. Saying that you will build on the current method also tells them that you are not rejecting it.

For someone you can speak to more casually, "I have an idea. Would you listen?" is also fine.

When Someone Points Out a Mistake, Thank Them First and Say You Will Check

When someone points out an error, such as a wrong number, first say thank you and promise to check.

• Boss: "Aren't the numbers in this document a little off?"
• Reply: "Thank you for pointing that out. I'll check right away."

You can use this phrase even when it has not been decided that the mistake is yours. By saying "I'll check," you are only saying that, not admitting a mistake. If, after checking, you find that you were not in error, state the facts.

• "I checked, and this number matches the latest document."

If you express thanks first, stating the facts is less likely to sound like an excuse.

However, if you are being scolded for having voiced an opinion at all, or if you are being denied because of your character or where you come from, this is not a problem that can be solved by changing how you speak. In that case, consult a contact point other than your boss, or the human resources department.

References

1. "無礼講 (Entry from Digital Daijisen and Rekishi Minzoku Yōgo Jiten, as included in the Weblio dictionary)," Digital Daijisen is published by Shogakukan, and Rekishi Minzoku Yōgo Jiten by Nichigai Associates (as shown on the Weblio page). https://www.weblio.jp/content/無礼講
2. "Compliments: Research notes (Japanese Compliments section)," CARLA (University of Minnesota). https://archive.carla.umn.edu/speechacts/compliments/research.html
3. "Annotated bibliography: Japanese Compliments (ComplimentsBiblio)," CARLA (University of Minnesota). https://archive.carla.umn.edu/speechacts/japanese/compliments/ComplimentsBiblio.htm
4. 昂 燕妮, "日本語会話におけるほめに対する「情報的コメント」の応答" (Informative comments in responses to compliments in Japanese conversation), Japanese Association for Language and Society, Shakai Gengo Kagaku (Journal of the Japanese Association of Sociolinguistic Sciences), Vol. 28, No. 2, pp. 16-31, 2026. https://www.jstage.jst.go.jp/article/jajls/28/2/28_16/_article/-char/ja